A cookie without sugar is a cracker.

As a woman obsessed with stand-up, I nearly died when NBC created "Last Comic Standing." Many comics that I love have made their way through that show: DC Benny, Kathleen Madigan, Gabriel Iglesias. But one that really did it for me was Gary Gulman.

He is clever, he is intelligent, and best of all he's clean! He's like Bob Saget if there was more Danny Tanner in him. The most risque joke I've ever head from him has to do with "The Pill." "There's a pill that cures polio.... that's not The Pill." No agenda, no promotion of a personal outlook. Just a great balance of truth and timing.

Seriously, check out his reflection on his love of grapes and his hatred for grapefruit. I laugh because I say to myself, 'why didn't I think of that? It is perfectly true!'

(I'm unsure of the legality of posting his work here, but since I might just be shouting at air, here goes...)
On the abject hatred of grapefruit

He's a worker-- I learned this on Last Comic Standing, and when he toured with the infamous Dane Cook ("Tourgasm"). He keeps notebooks upon notebooks on his topics, writing until he has enough material to present. I believe I heard somewhere George Carlin was the same way. This makes a lot of sense, since this is probably why he doesn't have to rely on insults and crude language. It's like the old saying: Proper Preparation Prevents Poor Performance.

So here's to you, Gary Gulman-- a tall drink of water who truly is refreshing. I raise my cup of grapefruit-free fruit cocktail to you.